Okay. So, how do you know if you’ve pulled a muscle hefting around a squirming, wiggling 27 lb toddler, or if your gallbladder is going to kill you? No really - anybody? I suppose the ultrasound tomorrow will help determine if I’m just a complete wuss that can’t take the pain radiating from under my right ribs, or if my gallbladder is actually the source of the problem. I feel like a 70 year old man! My retinal issues, my gallbladder. WTF!?!

Why is it that I always feel like a wimp when I go to the Doc about a “moderate” symptom? No, the pain isn’t going to kill me. But no, it hasn’t gone away since Saturday. It’s more than uncomfortable. But hell - it didn’t keep me from having the BEST NIGHT’S SLEEP IN WEEKS last night, no matter how much pain I was in when I woke up.

Sean slept for 10 straight hours last night. I wish I could formulate and replicate the exact conditions that caused this glorious and blessed miracle of sleep. But, sadly, I’m sure that it was a fleeting exception. Cross your fingers and toes and everything in between that Sean sleeps gloriously again for yet another night. We all need it.

Sean and I read and read and read together all day long. There are books all over the house. I’ll often find Sean in his room sitting quietly on the twin bed on the floor with books scattered around him for 10-15 minutes at a time, by himself. For those of you who know how much of a hyper-kinetic physical BOY Sean is, that kind of quiet focus is incredible to observe. We’ve been reading Usborne’s First Words book (thank you Aunt Carolee, the Book Fairy!) quite a lot these past few weeks. Sean likes to kiss the baby, point at the children’s teeth and grimace, and find all of the shoes in the book. He always turns to the train and plane page first - what a boy.

This afternoon, I met Pat at our favorite Asian restaurant for lunch. There were three fish sculptures hanging on the walls. Sean turned around to me and took his nuk out and opened and closed his mouth like a fish while pointing at the walls. Momentous! His very first animal sound association. Ok - less of a sound and more of an amusing mouth movement. But very cute.

It really is amazing to me some of the things that Sean comprehends at this age. Things that he’s learned from observation or repetition, but not necessarily from active effort to teach him on my part. This morning, having pulled a pair of pants out of the laundry, Sean tried to put them on his legs. Of course, the fact that he was wearing footy PJs made this enormously difficult, but it was too cool for words to watch him make this leap. We haven’t really been practicing clothes at all, but I talk all the time through every step of getting dressed. So fun to watch those connections being made.

In the spirit of documenting snapshots of Sean’s life, here’s an inventory of Sean’s signs, words & pronunciations that he communicates to us:

Signs:
1. All Done (accompanied with the sound “Aw?”)
2. Hungry
3. Wait
4. Water
5. More (very very rarely, when prompted)
6. Diaper (or fart/poop - he’s getting very accurate about this one)
7. Thank you (mostly when prompted)
8. Milk

Words
1. Hi (emphatically!)
2. Shoes
3. Home (comes out more like “Ho”)
4. Daddy
5. Bathtime (”Bata”)
6. Go! (or more often, “Go go go go!”, with increasing more Go’s for how excited he is to get out the door)
7. Button (”Tata”)
8. Hat (”Ha” - and very rarely)
9. Tachikoma (”Tachi”, a soft think tank toy from Ghost in the Shell that Sean loves)
10. Yeah (with a very firm affirmative head nod)
11. Huh? (exactly like it sounds)
12. What’s that? (”Ta-taaaa?”)
13. Keys (new today!)
14. Jacket (Ja-kt)

And my absolute favorite form of communication are the huge hugs and wet sloppy kisses that we spontaneously get all day long. Kid’s a lover, not a fighter.

A faux New York times handed out today in New York city.

Just putting them on the record for amusement’s sake. This blog is so much of a memory book for me that I wouldn’t want to miss writing down the three most terrifying things to Sean. Things that will make him physically back up against a wall to get away from them, climb into my arms and over my shoulders, scream with fear and cry like there’s no tomorrow:

1. Harmonicas
2. Hearing someone’s voice over speakerphone
3. An elephant trumpeting

Sean officially has 9 teeth now. He managed to push through another tooth this morning, or last night…or yesterday. Frankly, I wasn’t really paying attention. The constant whining and screaming, waking up at night, clear runny nose - it all seemed just par for the course over the past few weeks. And really, who wants to stick their fingers into a toddler’s mouth to feel the gums where 8 shiny, new and SHARP teeth await you? Not me, thank you very much.

It’s such a relief to realize that he’s not by nature a complete pill. Just a little boy going through the excruciating pain of teething without his parents having a clue. Poor kid. I feel like giving him Ibuprofen to say I’m sorry for not paying attention.

I cannot be more proud of Virginia today. But I have to say that I know the woman that single-handedly brought Obama to victory in the former southern stronghold that I used to call home. My Mom went door to door yesterday in Virginia after manning the polls in the morning in Arlington. At one house, her foot caught on an uneven patch of sidewalk and she fell…hard. She fractured her upper left arm and bruised & scraped just about every inch of her that hit the ground. And here’s the thing. She KEPT GOING. A few more houses to go. Very proud of my Mama. As she said, Obama was worth it.

I woke up this morning still buzzing from the adrenaline of crying tears of joy last night. Anticipation, relief, hope. I was so proud of our country - so proud of the resounding proof that racism cannot triumph when shown the promise of hope and change. Obama’s acceptance speech moved me in ways that I never thought I would feel about the US. I was for the first time in my adult life PROUD to be American, proud to be part of a country who again mobilized each other to support a revolution against tyranny and oppression.

And then I heard that Proposition 8 might actually pass in California. I feel like I’m on a manic depressive roller coaster of guilt and hope. We’ve taken one great step forward by electing Obama. I had hoped we were ready to take the next step towards erasing discrimination and hatred toward our fellow man.